My Father
I’ve been thinking about my Father’s death more often lately. I really haven’t written much or talked much about it. It has taken me a while to process and accept it. He died last October (2005) from a brain tumor.
Due to my parent’s divorce when I was seven, I only saw him about once a month on average and less often as I got older. Due to my age and the lack of time spent with him I never forged a very close and intimate relationship with my Dad.
It wasn’t really until I got married in 2004 that I began to have a closer relationship with him. My wife and my Dad’s other half, Sally, really got along well. As the rapport between my wife Kristin and Sally grew, we began to spend more time visiting them - and I began to feel my Father’s presence much more strongly than ever before. Then a year later he got sick and died.
Its taken me a very long time to process it. Its only recently that I find myself frequently stopping to think about him; to look at his picture and realize that he is really gone. There is a real hole there. There are so many things I wish I could say to him and talk to him about… Things I know only he could understand. Things about being a man. Things about being a husband. Things about being human and growing old…
My Father was a simple man. He was not an intellectual or high-powered executive. But He was one of the most gentle people I have ever known. Everyone liked him and he liked people. He was always so proud to introduce me to his friends when I would visit. I remember him telling me one day when I was very young, “Never feel anyone is beneath you - Never think you are better than anyone”. A powerful lesson from a very humble man. I always remembered that and have tried to live by it all my life.
I really miss him.
